Welcome to JTC Inc.

Chaps: because if they had an ass, they'd just be called pants.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Flogging A Dead Horse

After what can only be described as an overwhelming response to Wednesday's e-mail exchange post, I decided to show the creativity of a manufactured pop-star, and just do it again.

The topic of today's exchange was a lunch reservation that CoCo made for the JTC Board and our graphophobic stenographer for February 27th.

One thing to note here: between my apparent disdain evident below for this "culture differences" workshop, and Wednesday's comment about migrant farm workers, the thought occurs that I may be starting to look like a big, big racist. Rest assured that I love everyone from all backgrounds and ethnicities. Except for the fucking Dutch.

On with the show:

From: JohnnyM
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:21 PM
To: CoCo
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

Dude! On Friday, February 27th, we’re in that fucking “cultural differences” workshop until noon. Looks like we’ll have to leave for an important meeting around 11:20…

Sit near the door,
Johnny M

________________________________

From: CoCo
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:23 PM
To: JohnnyM
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

Dude! I totally saw that before I booked and thought “The restaurant only has 11:30 available, eh? Well, I really want to go to lunch on Friday at 11:30, but that would conflict with the last half hour of a cultural differences workshop. What should I do?”

It was a really tough decision. Really tough.

Yeah – we both have an 11:30 meeting if for some reason we can’t just get up and leave without needing to say anything.

CoCo
________________________________

From: JohnnyM
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:25 PM
To: CoCo
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

I can’t believe you just arbitrarily decided that I was going to miss the last 30 minutes of what will likely be a terrific workshop without even asking me!

Great decision,
Johnny M
________________________________

From: CoCo
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:26 PM
To: JohnnyM
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

In a fast-paced business like JTC, we need quick and decisive action or we simply won’t be competitive.

We also need some fucking blog posts,
CoCo
________________________________

From: JohnnyM
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:27 PM
To: CoCo
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

I totally agree.

Competitive with who?,
Johnny M
________________________________

From: CoCo
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:27 PM
To: JohnnyM
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

Others in the same business as us.

CoCo
________________________________

From: JohnnyM
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:28 PM
To: CoCo
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

Right – of course. Two minor follow-up questions:

1) What business is that?
2) Who else is in it?
Johnny M
________________________________

From: CoCo
Sent: Friday, February 13, 2009 1:29 PM
To: JohnnyM
Subject: RE: Winterlicious

1) The business we work towards every day with the expert staff at JTC.
2) All of JTC’s competitors.

CoCo

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sit near the door. Most important meeting rule ever!

Anonymous said...

Dude, I ordered a JTC thong from the "Thongs & Things: Official JTC Apparel Store" and it hasn't even come yet. This is bullshit!
Your friend, Quinton.

JohnnyM said...

Dear Quinton,

We here at JTC appreciate your interest in our high-quality thongs. I've checked our sales reports, and nothing has been ordered from the store in the previous 3 months. Uh...I mean, despite our heavy sales volumes, I've personally checked everything and there is no record of your order. Let me know if you want me to look into it further. I personally ordered some stuff, and that handsome mug that everyone should have came without a hitch...

Yours in eCommerce,
JohnnyM

abbdi said...

"I'd choose a homeless man (with no internet connection) over her"

nice!