Welcome to JTC Inc.

Chaps: because if they had an ass, they'd just be called pants.

Thursday, June 03, 2010

Odds and ends: The best place to slaughter a pig, and make her open the box

Hi folks! We are not dead! Although that news may disappoint our reader (pluralizing that word always feels like I am being too optimistic about our fan base), we are just being the lazy muppets that our soul-crushing Corporate jobs have trained us to be. So to break the silence, here are two items for now:

The best place to slaughter a pig

So my co-board members and pretty much everyone I know often gest playfully at my (poor commitment to) vegetarianism. Most comments are related to me ruining every meal, or revolve around linkages between my purported homosexuality and choice not to eat anything that had parents (or sometimes, anything that casts a shadow). Often I still find ways to take pride in my efforts to curb the environmental impacts of our absurd overconsumption of meat, surprisingly, but unfortunately, some fuckers still have to find a way to make vegetarianism as fluffy as a kitten, and as a result, not helping my gayputation. Other than slaughtering a pig in the middle of Yonge street in front of this parade in protest of it, I could easily spend hours thinking up incredibly hilarious anti-vegetarian signs and or costumes, and write about them here for your enjoyment. But as mentioned off the top, I am way too lazy, so this is it kids. Speaking of cock-teasing...

Make her open the box

Not much to this one, but driving past this makes me giggle every time, especially when my CHP says Make her open the box! as we drive by. Many JTC board members are huge fans of this incredibly awesome and historically important SNL skit, and if you really enjoy that, spotting this purveyor of hard, long docks is just hilarious to me. (Spotted on highway 400 just south of Innisfil, Ontario):