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Sunday, April 29, 2007

Update / Crazy Golfers

So, let's face facts - April was not a banner month for the JTC blog. Only 7 posts in the month (including this one), with 5 of those happening in the first 10 days. Things have definitely been a tad quiet over the last few weeks, so we'll see if we can't get the old posting output up a little to satisfy our faithful reader(s). Kudos to Co-Co for sending PChrist and myself scolding e-mails for our lack of posts. (Not really - GFY, Co-Co)

And I mean really - I should have a ton of material...I'm leaving work early (and by "early", I mean "6:15pm") every day to come home and shoot up my parents' diabetic cat. There have been all sorts of jokes about problems finding veins, strapping a belt to his arm, etc., etc. The photos I could set-up alone would be pure gold. Ah well...

In other news, last weekend I played my first round of golf for the year. I could only find two friends who were available to play, which always makes me nervous, because there's always a chance we might be grouped up with a "single" golfer to round out our foursome. Now, don't get me wrong, it's not like I don't like other people (actually, that's a lie - I don't), it's just that people who are single golfers invariably turn out to be fucking nut jobs.

They're not the type of nut jobs you would see on the TTC (now, THERE'S an idea for another post), you know - dirty, urine-soaked clothes, etc. They're far more dangerous, because they APPEAR to be normal. They're all, "Hi! You fellas don't mind if I join you, do you?" And while you want to reply, "Actually, I do mind. Why don't you have any friends? Alarm bells are ringing over here, buddy." You instead reply, "Of course not!"

Then, after 2 - 3 holes, you realize that you've committed to spending the next 4 hours with a raging psychopath. The dude we were golfing with last weekend alternated between screaming at his putts ("GET IN THERE, YOU LITTLE PRICK!") and screaming at his drives ("I GOT A HOLD OF THAT ONE!") It was all very relaxing. After the round, we got to enjoy him screaming at the Raptors game on the TV in the clubhouse.

I feel this whole phenomenon of crazy single golfers raises an interesting question: Are single golfers crazy because they golf by themselves? Or are they golfing by themselves because they're crazy? Riddle me THAT. If anyone out there wants to give me about $1 million in research funds, I will commit to getting to the bottom of this mystery.

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